


Lost (In You)

by klixxy



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Angst, Idiots in Love, Love, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, POV Javier Fernández, Poetic, Random & Short, Romance, Tragic Romance, Unrequited Love, Vague
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-20
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2021-02-17 22:54:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21501127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klixxy/pseuds/klixxy
Summary: I’m lost, lost, lost.Lost in love.Lost inyou.
Relationships: Javier Fernández/Yuzuru Hanyu, kind of - Relationship
Comments: 3
Kudos: 18





	Lost (In You)

**Author's Note:**

> idk what i'm doing anymore but here i am, writing something again,,,, 
> 
> this was just some really short, shitty thing i wrote while my head feels stuffed full of tissues and is pounding against my head at midnight so... i hope its at least not cringey???
> 
> inspiration from this incredible song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r1tKquhyzU 
> 
> (yes i know the song is ridiculously old and hopelessly romantic and slightly sad, you can't blame me)

I’m lost.

Lost, in the way your eyes sparkle like the light of a million stars upon a clear night sky, a thousand shades of black swirling within their depths, a fire dancing just past the sheen of midnight.

Lost, in the way your hair billows in the wind, flowing like a piece of shimmering black ink of a painter, when you skate across the ice with the unshakeable trust that the ice will guide you, that your skates will catch you if you should fall.

Lost, in the way that your lips move up and down as you breathe, the way that they shimmer rosemary against the paleness of your skin, the darkness of your eyes, the way that they curl up, holding in place a thousand flames under your tongue.

Lost, in the way your shoulders are broad and yet small enough to hold comfortably within my own two hands, the way they gently curve down, down, into a seemingly petite waist, different from any other, but hiding strong muscles carved into the skin beneath a layer of clothes.

Lost, in the way your voice sounds, high-pitched but not grating on the ears, flowing through the air, purer than a thousand symphonies, more beautiful than the greatest piece the most amazing pianist could play.

Lost, in the way you pronounce your r’s and your l’s, not quite right, always something different you are trying to say.

Lost, in the hundreds of voices that thunder through the stadium when you skate, when you whisper your soul into your jumps, breathe magic into your spins, and show a million worlds, a million breathtaking stories of tears and romance and life to the audience.

Lost, in the rain of yellow and red bears that scatter the ice like flowers in bloom, blossoming up towards the sky.

Lost, in your hands, small and yet large in my palm, warm and yet cold on the ice, smooth and soft against my calloused fingers, melded into my own.

Lost, in your smile, the way it brightens up the world like the moon, casting its silvery glow upon all that look up to it, listening to all of the wishes that are wished upon its prowess.

Lost, in the way that your eyes crinkle as you laugh, the way that your eyes turn to small crescents, storming not with determination, not with courage and passion, but with a hurricane of pure, unstoppable joy.

Lost, in the way, despite all of your gold medals, you always try to get better, always try to defeat yourself of the past, always have a goal, regardless of what everybody else wants.

Lost, in the way that despite all of the scars carved into your skin, the cracks spreading along your chest, despite the tears that overflow like a leaky faucet from your eyes, you always, inevitably, stand up again, and prove everybody wrong, prove the world wrong.

Lost, in the way that you laugh, a loud, beautiful thing that cascades from your lips, uncaring of what others may think, letting the gentle light slip out from inside your soul.

Lost, in the way that you are untouchable, a man not of this world.

Lost.

I am lost in love.

Love, love, love. Bringing a rush of heat to my cheeks, burning them. Turning my legs shaky with nervousness when you reach in to give me a hug, making my treacherous heart beat faster at the mere utter of your name. Lighting a bonfire in my heart, only adding more fuel to the flames every time that you giggle my name with your cheery-colored lips, every time that you smile up at me, your eyes a collection of constellations upon a midnight sky, etched into the alluring paleness of your cheeks.

I’m lost, lost, lost.

Lost in love.

Lost in you.

Lost in the uncountable things that make you different, the stupid, ugly faces you make, lost in you, you, _you._

And yet…

I am lost without a map.

I am lost without hands to guide my way, without a light to shine through the darkness.

I am lost within a sea of dreams, in an ocean of longings and hopes I can only graze with my fingertips.

I am lost within you

But you…

Are not lost

Within

Me. 

I am lost in a man I can never love.

I am lost in you.

And that hurts.


End file.
